Hello to all flowers wilting in the scorching sunlight, vampire rockstars, and hands with pencils floating over them.
This morning I woke up feeling nice and cool. Unlike the last few days, my room wasn’t actually the temperature of a tropical fish habitat. I squinted at the flamingly-bright window, shrugged to myself, and after the mother came in to wake me up several times I finally got up. I was wondering why it was so nice out today. But I wouldn’t complain.
My mom went out to hang up some laundry on the balcony. I poked my head out, and–
WOOSH. The hot hit me like a fire demon holding burningly bright stagelights over its head.
(Turns out the ‘nice, surprisingly cool day’ was the air conditioner doing its air conditioning.)
DARN THIS PLACE I LIVE IN! DARN IT TO HECK! (What? I’m not going to say swear words, no matter how ‘darn it to heck’ sounds.) I want to live in Iceland SO BADLY. In Iceland, not only is there lots of green and ice and accordion-playing people, there’s also the people from one of my favorite bands, Of Monsters and Men. I’m already making blueprints for a wind-powered and solar-powered raft made of pool noodles and lawnchairs that will take me across the ocean to Iceland. I’ll show up in Reykjavik and quickly learn to play the accordion, meanwhile slipping in unnoticed into Icelandic society. In three months I’ll no longer be Onceabasementdog, Canadian blogeress, I’ll be Brinjar Ragnarsson, Icelandic accordion-player. I’ll start a new blog containing strange, quirky monologues in Icelandic.
Or maybe not. Maybe I’ll just keep living here, in this wonderful, wonderful burningly hot and humid wasteland where we would all melt like plastic action figures in microwaves if we didn’t have the blessed scientific creation called air conditioning.
I wish this blog entry had a point, but it really doesn’t. I just wish I was an icecube sometimes. You know? I wouldn’t even mind if people plopped me into their drinks or anything. I’d get to hang out in a freezer every day. My life would be short-lived, but at least enjoyable and hot-free.
Yours most sincerely as never, Onceabasementdog.
P.S: a little note for everyone. I checked it the other day and I have nine followers on my blog! That might not seem like a big deal, but to me it really is. Also I’ve been getting likes-by-the-plenty and with every ‘like’ I get more and more giddy and pleased with myself. So keep following along with the adventures of Onceabasementdog, Blog-Reader. If enough people discover this, I have a pretty good feeling I’ll end up with a TV show. I’m looking at you again, HBO.